Yay! Street pills!

Me looking at that rabioli

He liked fava beanis

Lots of experimenting

I’m sure someone has. It probably tastes like popcorn or something

Why… Wh- what? Do you sweat blood?

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He looked much better after putting on a few pounds and beating the shit out of a blind lawyer

I fucking loooove my RTIC half-gallon jug! I suck down and refill that shit more times in a day than a burned-out parent at SeaWorld with a novelty cup

When you’ve got HEB, the Buc-ee’s coolers are kinda “meh” in comparison. And their home decor section is just an overpriced miniature Walmart without a single beaver on anything.

As for the kolaches: go to Kolache Factory or visit West, Texas and tell me you can ever eat another kolache anywhere else.

Aaaaaand we’re broke… But I got 4 pairs of pajamas, 10 hats, 7 shirts, and 32 bandanas all with cartoon beavers on them. I also got us 14lbs of our favorite jerky, 6lbs of the jerky we always forget we don’t like, and 8 different kinds of barbecue sandwiches and wraps. And some Beaver Nuggets.

If everything goes according to plan, we should have enough diarrhea and constipation to wreck every Pilot bathroom from here to El Paso

I really don’t care what starts the revolution, but I’d be pleased as punch if history books of the future had to note that gamers ate the first CEO after he shit on their favorite devs

You think that’s some copium, watch this:

When you’re a child having a sick-day, you get to stay home from school and watch TV, which is absolutely 💯. What temperature do you need to have to get a sick-day? 100°

In foreign units, 100° is the temperature at which water boils. What has boiling water ever done for anyone? Literally nothing. But in freedom units, water boils at 212°. 212 is a palindrome and palindromes are so cool, they could be classified as 💯. As we all know, 100 is the coolest number, which is why that’s how high grades go.

Finally, using USA standards, calculating calories in food merely requires measuring how much energy is required to raise 3.5 oz water 1.8° F by burning the food and then dividing by 1000. Using your weird unpatriotic methods, you’d have to measure how much energy is required to raise 100 grams of water 1° C by burning the food and then not dividing by anything??? Sounds lame!

Someone give me a Gatorade, those mental gymnastics were a hell of a workout

SedaGIVE?!?

Which is why it’s often found on men. Also frequently on women

Weenus

I’ll have what he’s having

Well, of course. If it’s described as “really good,” I think we can assume it fits.

If it doesn’t fit or proves too be too painful, I guess that falls more towards “disappointing,” but that feels like a misnomer

Yet researchers should not explain these phenomenon as they tend to fornicate with matriarchal individuals and deal in misinformation, which I find upsetting